Quincy lay in bed, slowly drifting off to sleep. He got into the habit of keeping a notepad and pen on his bedside table. In these twilight moments ideas would flash through his head. He’d been pondering the nature of infinity and was desperate for a breakthrough.
At 1 AM he sat up in his bed. Brilliance was rattling around his brain. He scribbled down all his thoughts then settled back down to sleep, satisfied with himself.
Quincy snatched up his notepad first thing in the morning. He was eager to read his discoveries. What he read was this:
-Put lederhosen on moose and have them patrol traffic. It will reduce traffic fatalities by 108%.
-The siege of Vicksburg by Ulysses S. Grant in the American Civil War lasted from May 19 to July 4, 1863, exactly 46 days.
-Excessive earwax builds up in the ear canal and causes brain damage. This explains why iPod users are so stupid.
-The only thing greater than infinity is infinity plus one. Boo-yah.
Quincy placed the notepad back on his night table. He’d have to stay as a greeter at Walmart a little while longer.