He’s Toilet Paper Smart

“What should we get mom for Mother’s Day?” said Josh.

“How about one of those one cup coffee makers?” said Neil.

“Why would she want a one cup coffee maker? What good is that?” said Josh.

“It’s just her and dad, and they’re super easy to use,” said Neil. “You can get all sorts of cool blends and tea and stuff.”

“So you’re suggesting for Mother’s Day we give her the gift of instant coffee,” said Josh.

“It’s so high tech it’s like instanter coffee,” said Neil.

“What does that even mean?”

“I’m just saying,” said Neil.

“You’re making up words,” said Josh.

“No. Instanter’s a real word. It’s not my fault you’re so poorly versed in the English language,” said Neil.

“Are you for real? I’m a professional song writer. Words are what I do. Just because you got ‘word of the day’ toilet paper,” said Josh.

“Hey, you gave me that for Christmas,” said Neil.

“As a gag gift,” said Josh.

“I’m not wasting perfectly good toilet paper. The fact that it enriches my intellect is a bonus,” said Neil.

“It enhances you’re verbal diarrhea,” said Josh.

“How winsome,” said Neil.

“At least I know what to get you for your birthday,” said Josh.

“By the way, can you get that by the case? Suzy was over the other day and thought it was great. She wanted to know where I get it.”

“I’ll look into it. Now can we please get back to mom? So we’ve agreed to get her a Keurig,” said Josh.

“Sounds like a sterling stratagem,” said Neil.

“Would you stop it?” said Josh.

“Hey, my toilet paper makes me smarter. What’s your’s done for you lately?” said Neil.


About vanyieck

There is nothing about me that is more interesting than you. I am a man. I have a wife and family. I have a career. I have two dogs. I
This entry was posted in fiction, flash fiction, humor, humour, short fiction, short story, story and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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