The R&D Department

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Tanner settled into his chair across from an elegantly dressed young woman. He was still surprised at her invitation to coffee. All he knew was her name was Felicia, she worked in R&D, and she was the loveliest woman he’d ever seen in person. Tanner soaked in the moment.

“You work in Human Resources,” she said.

“Yes,” he purred.

“That must be fascinating. You must have a million stories,” said Felicia. Her bright brown eyes warmed him down to the depths of his soul.

“It’s never boring,” said Tanner, modestly.

Felicia leaned forward. “Tell me about the strangest interview you’ve ever had.”

“Oh, well,” stammered Tanner. His head was spinning from the attention. His face flushed. “There was this one guy who had all the bones of his skeleton tattooed onto his body up to his shoulders.”

“That is strange, but it doesn’t sound that unusual,” said Felicia.

“He was applying for a position in our Medical Sales Division.”

“Oh. What did you do?” She gently touched Tanner’s knee.

“I gave him the job.”

“Why?”

Tanner looked at Felicia’s angelic face and thought for a second. A sinister smile spread across his wrinkled face. “Let’s just say I didn’t have to buy beer for a month.”

“I don’t understand.”

“That’s all I’ll say,” said Tanner.

Felicia gave Tanner a suspicious look. “What ever happened to the skeleton man?”

“It’s a funny thing. Turns out he had a criminal record. Stole a bunch of stuff. Pharmaceuticals, mostly. Last I heard, he was on the run.”

“At least you had beer,” said Felicia. Her expression hardened.

“What? It’s not my fault. I couldn’t have seen that coming.”

“Wasn’t it your job to do a background check?”

“Sure, but he said he didn’t want a few small mistakes to haunt his future. You wouldn’t.”

“There’s a huge difference between a small mistake and a felon,” said Felicia, coldly.

“What does it matter now? He’s gone. You’re here, I’m here. Listen, let’s talk about you. What sort of research do you do?”

“I’m not in research. I’m part of the company’s other R&D. Reallocations and Dismissals.”

The colour drained from Tanner’s face. “This isn’t a date, is it?”

Felicia laughed.

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About vanyieck

There is nothing about me that is more interesting than you. I am a man. I have a wife and family. I have a career. I have two dogs. I
This entry was posted in coffee, date, fiction, flash fiction, Human Resources, humor, humour, R&D, short fiction, short story, story, tattoo and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to The R&D Department

  1. Tony Trudgian says:

    That’s the funniest “pink slip” I’ve heard!

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