Couch Potato Day


“Have you noticed that everyone is claiming a day?” asked Blake, as he played Skyrim on his PS3.

“As usual, I have no idea what you mean,” replied Caryne.

“You know, like Earth Day, or Breast Cancer Awareness Day. Stuff like that.”

“Okay. What about it?”

“It’s just that, like, everybody demands social awareness. Giving back and stuff.”

“What’s wrong with that? People need help,” said Caryne.

Blake paused his game and looked at Caryne. “That’s just it. Everybody needs help. Everybody wants something from me. Time. Money. It’s like I’m supposed to be some sort of battery everybody wants to use up.”

“Some people help because it makes them feel good.”

“That’s not exactly altruistic, is it?” asked Blake.

“I really don’t know where you’re going with this,” complained Caryne.

“Everybody takes. Nobody really gives. That’s why I decided to create my own day. Couch Potato Day,” announced Blake.

“Isn’t that every day for you?”

“That’s the beauty of it. Couch Potato Day can be any day I want. When I get tired of all the other ‘Days’ that suck the life out of me, I announce Couch Potato Day. I even have a slogan: ‘Leave Me Alone’.”

Caryne shook her head at Blake. “You’re one disgusting, selfish freak.”

“You want disgusting? Let me ask you this. Have you ever wondered why, after all the time and money spent on these causes, nothing’s ever been cured? No problem’s been solved? All we’ve done is created more problems. At least Couch Potato Day actually accomplishes something.”

“Oh yeah? What’s that?”

“People leave me alone.”

Caryne scowled at Blake, then stood up. “Let me help you,” she said. She stormed out, slamming the door behind her.

“I thought she’d never leave,” Blake said to himself. He settled back on his couch and restarted his game.


About vanyieck

There is nothing about me that is more interesting than you. I am a man. I have a wife and family. I have a career. I have two dogs. I
This entry was posted in bitter, couch potato, Earth Day, fiction, flash fiction, humor, humour, PS3, short fiction, short story, Skyrim, story and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Couch Potato Day

  1. bernquist says:

    haha that’s a nice looking potato! I could use a couch potato day every once in a while; Blake has a good point I think :>

  2. Tony Trudgian says:

    I want to know what book the “couch potato” is reading?

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