Two retirees sat in the food court of the mall after their morning walk.
“I read that the city outlawed tobogganing within city limits,” said Bert.
“Why on God’s green earth would they do that?” asked Mortie.
“Lawsuits. Someone got hurt and sued the city for a bundle,” said Bert.
“What’s this city coming to?”
“I hear you. It’s the height of stupidity,” said Bert.
Mortie seemed to drift off for a moment, staring off into space.
“Penny for your thoughts,” said Bert.
“You can’t. They don’t make ‘em any more,” said Mortie.
“I was just thinking. They have a way of measuring intelligence, but no way to measure stupidity,” mused Mortie. “I don’t think people want to know the truth.”
“Of course not. We don’t want to recognize that the world is getting stupider. Is that a word? Stupider? Listen to me, eh? You know what I mean,” said Bert. “That’s why I’m not an evolutionist, you know.”
“Are you being serious?”
“I can’t believe you still are. You said it yourself. People don’t want to know the truth,” said Bert.
“I read about a couple of criminals who couldn’t find any masks, so they drew all over their faces with permanent markers. They looked like a couple of toddlers,” said Mortie.
“It’s not just criminals, you know. Have you ever seen what passes for a celebrity nowadays?”
“Ugh. Don’t even get me started,” said Mortie. “Like the guy who married the girl with the big caboose who’s only famous for being famous. They named their kid a direction. His whole life people will tell him where to go.”
“Exactly. See what I mean? Evolution? More like counter-evolution,” said Bert.
“You make a compelling argument,” pondered Mortie.
“What? You made it for me,” said Bert.
“Like it was difficult,” said Mortie.
The two men chuckled as they took sips of coffee. Bert glanced at his watch.
“Oy. Look at the time. I gotta go or I’ll miss my grandson’s kindergarten graduations. Can you believe it? A graduation. The kid can’t colour inside the lines and they act like he’s finishing Harvard,” said Bert.
Mortie laughed. “See you tomorrow, Einstein.”