Slip of the Tongue


Tamara tossed a bill across the table in frustration. “I can’t stand this. Why is it so hard to make ends meet?”

Lance shuffled to the table, eating an apple and rolling his eyes.

“We gotta cut costs,” said Tamara. She shot Lance an accusing glare.

“Don’t look at me. All I get are necessities,” shrugged Lance.

Tamara choked. “Are you serious? How much to you spend on comics in a month? What about your sleeve tattoo? And don’t get me started about your record collection. Who even uses vinyl anymore?”

“It’s retro.”

“Retro my- ,“ she stopped short, but her words still cut Lance.

“Oh yeah? What about your gym membership? It’s not like it’s making a difference.” Lance’s eyes went large. He tried to suck the words back into his mouth, but it was far too late.

Tears welled up in Tamara’s eyes. “How could you,” she demanded.

“You made me mad. I didn’t mean it,” said Lance.

Tamara got to her feet and slapped Lance across the face. He staggered back and grabbed his cheek.

“I deserved that,” admitted Lance

“I meant it,” replied Tamara.

“You know, violence is not going to fix our financial problems,” quipped Lance.

“True,” admitted Tamara.

“So what’s the plan?”

Tamara thought for a second. “I have to say this little conversation’s been eye opening.”

“Really? How so?”

“Not only are you a huge financial burden, you’re a thoughtless jerk,” said Tamara.

“A lovable jerk, right?” asked Lance.

“Not any more. Pack your bags. We’re done,” demanded Tamara.

“Wait. Don’t be so emotional. What’ll you do without me?”

Tamara smiled knowingly. “Good questions. First, I’ll have more money. Second, I won’t have to deal with someone who doesn’t love me for me.”

“I said I was sorry,” interrupted Lance.

He flinched when she raised her hand to silence him.” Actually, you didn’t. And judging by your reaction, I certainly can’t use you to protect me.”

“So that’s it, then,” said Lance.


“You’ll get lonely,” warned Lance.

Tamara shook her head. “I’ll get a dog. At least it’ll be more useful.”


About vanyieck

There is nothing about me that is more interesting than you. I am a man. I have a wife and family. I have a career. I have two dogs. I
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2 Responses to Slip of the Tongue

  1. Anthony Trudgian says:

    Was it Einstein that said “an action causes reaction”…sometimes we men never learn!

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